Tolkien – Christ Centered Spirituality

Solar Eclipse, a Glimpse of Tolkienian Humor!

Next time you see the see the Sun and the Moon, hopefully, it will not merely an incandescent ball of fire and a cold crater ridden piece of rock, rather your heart will be drawn to the unrequited love story between the angelic beings, Tilion and Arien. May be, it is not as unrequited as I make it to be, thanks to the eclipses! And the brilliance of Illuvathar’s creation… pointing back to the brilliance of God’s handiwork.

Today’s Solar Eclipse gives an opportunity to talk about Tolkien’s romantic sly sense of Humor. As I was looking at the (partial) Solar eclipse at Houston with some friends from work, I remembered that Tolkien, in his creation mythology in the Silmarillion, has an intriguing story about the creation of the Sun and the Moon.

When Illuvathar, God, sang the world into creation, in the first go, the earth was lit by light of the stars and the white trees of Valinor (Paradise). After the loss of that light, the Sun and the Moon were created. Sun is a female Valar, an angelic being, Arien. The Moon is male angelic being Tilion. Arien and Tilion are in charge of steering the sun and the moon. The Sun was meant the govern Earth’s day light, moon the night.

Tolkien says that Tilion is an unsteady hand steering the Moon, often in incorrect paths, thus ending up on the same side along the Sun. The idea being that Tilion can’t help steering recklessly towards the Sun, being love sick about Arien. This is the romantic in Tolkien. In order to explain the Moon showing up during the day, he comes up with a romantic solution that is humorous in the Tolkienian sense.

I don’t know if Tolkien develops this theme further into what Solar and Lunar eclipses mean, in the mythology, as to the relationship between Tilion and Arien. But that is very Tolkienis thing to do – develop some intriguing possibilities and leaving the rest for imagination!

Next time you see the see the Sun and the Moon, hopefully, it will not merely an incandescent ball of fire and a cold crater ridden piece of rock, rather your heart will be drawn to the mythic ballet of unrequited love between the angelic beings, Tilion and Arien. May be, it is not as unrequited as I make it to be, thanks to the eclipses! And the brilliance of Illuvathar’s creation… pointing back to the brilliance of God’s handiwork. All this to say this is Tolkien’s humorous way of adding a little bit more mythic meaning to our otherwise dreary existence on planet Earth!

Deep Spiritual Roots of Silence

Trees are spiritual because they have deep roots, roots that are unseen but their strength comes from their deep roots. Just like the trees, the deep roots of my own spirituality are not seen outside but it is those deep roots that strengthen me. The trees are also a place where many living things find their abode. . Christ is the one in whom I find my adobe and rest in. If I am deeply rooted in Christ, and grow out of Christ, then I will become an extension of Christ’s love that points people to the rest in Christ. The tree is a deeply mysterious being which reflects God’s nurturing and life giving side. So being among big trees in the evening was to be mystic presence of God.

Below is my account of a 6 hour spiritual discipline of silence that I followed from 5pm till 11 pm at the Memorial Park in Houston. I choose that place, because trees move my spirit to a place of wonderment about God. Trees are a place of deep life and consequently deep spirituality. Just like God showed His presence to David by the stars in the sky, for me, God manifests His presence to me by the trees. Perhaps, it shouldn’t surprise me that Treebeard (the guardian of all Trees) is my favorite character in Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings (of course no surprise either in that Tolkien channeled himself into Treebeard!).

Trees point to deep spiritual truths. They have deep roots, roots that are unseen but their strength comes from their deep roots. Just like the trees, the deep roots of my own Christ-centered spirituality are not seen outside but it is those deep roots that strengthen me. The trees are also a place where many living things find their abode. . Christ is the one in whom I find my adobe and rest in. If I am deeply rooted in Christ, and grow out of Christ, then I will become an extension of Christ’s love that points people to the rest in Christ. The tree is a deeply mysterious being which reflects God’s nurturing and life giving side. So being among big trees in the evening was to be mystic presence of God.

As always being alone and silent, my anxieties came up. I did not want to get stuck in my state of anxiety and so walked around looking, deeply looking, and meditating on the tree. There was this one tree which was so exquisitely beautiful – its dark branches that had fractal precision were like a painting of God across the light sky. Looking at the tree, carefully observing how the branches were shaped by God’s providence and design, I was drawn out of my self-absorption. Below is a picture of that tree.

I was walking among the trees looking at them I found myself moving from a state of self-absorption to a place of self-transcendence. I sat at a bench and looked at the trees. I took more picture of the dark ominous spiritual beings. As I was there, I did not know when it started but I realized that I was actually singing the song, “Spirit of the living God fall afresh on me…” Somehow even before my conscious mind was aware of it, my sub-conscious mind was reveling in the presence of God in that spiritual space.

After a while, as it got darker, I realized that I could see the moon above. I lay on the bench to look up at the moon. Dark clouds came between me and the moon but still the light of the moon couldn’t be dimmed off completely. I could see the moonlight form designs in the beautifully shaped clouds. I was reminded about how brilliant God’s design was. I kept watching the moon and the clouds back and forth, I don’t know for how long.

Then I went back to watching trees and taking pictures of trees which looked interesting… Then after a while as I was sitting on the bench looking at the trees, my body started swaying gently the way it usually does when I am in deep prayer, filled with the Spirit of God. I enjoyed being in God’s presence there. I felt like I did not want to leave that spiritual place, it was like the mountain top transfiguration experience that the disciples did not want to leave.

Of course, I had to come back to the real world. But there was an interesting difference. As I was back in the “real world”, the real world was now different because I was carrying with me the presence of God with me. Because of God’s presence being with me, everything I did where it was going to the gym or reading a book, it was now different – I was living out of a much deeper place in my soul, centered in Christ. The spiritual roots that I had had gone deeper into the soil of my being and was drawing it sweet nourishment from the deep source of God’s presence deep in me and that is what made the world come alive in a new way.

On Why Unhappiness is Not a bad thing!

Happiness is an allegory as happiness is always pointing to something else. One does not get to rest in happiness. On the other hand unhappiness makes for a better story because suffering and struggle makes for a good story. If the prince did not have to suffer crossing seven seas, climbing seven mountains, defeating seven monsters to get to the princess, it wouldn’t be meaningful story or romance. In fact, one could almost say, blessed are the unhappy for it makes their story more meaningful (Matt 5:4). That is why unhappiness in not (always) a bad things after all.

Haruki Murakami in his book Kafka On the Shore says, “…like Tolstoy said. Happiness is an allegory, unhappiness a story.” Reading this I was reminded about two things. One, the TV series Mad Men. Two, Tolkien’s book The Hobbit.

John Hamm, playing the central character Don Draper in the Mad Men TV series, is a hedonistic ad man who loves to get his way in the advertising industry. Once, a smug CEO tells John Hamm, “We are happy with our current agency. Why would we want to do business with you?”. Hamm replies, “You say you are happy with your current plan but what is happiness except that which you feel before you want more of it.” Happiness is always a moving target. The moment you think you have arrived, happiness is the next thing – always pointing to something else. An allegory is always pointing to something else. Happiness is an allegory.

In the Hobbit, Gandalf gets thirteen dwarfes and the hobbit Bilbo to go on an adventure brimming with hardships. Every time Bilbo faces hardships, whether it be fighting the trolls or getting drenched in the rain, Bilbo wishes he were back in his cozy home sitting by the fire with a cup of tea and a slice of cake (so British!). Bilbo’s team faces many hardship in their journey until they reach Rivendel, the Elf land, where they rest for 2 weeks. Tolkien says there was nothing really to report on the 2 week stay in the Elf paradise, as it was period of happiness and peace. The story starts again when they leave Rivendel to face the next stage of hardships in their journey towards the lonely mountain. It is being disturbed from our happy homeostasis that makes for a good story.

Happiness is an allegory as happiness is always pointing to something else. One does not get to rest in happiness. On the other hand unhappiness makes for a better story because suffering and struggle makes for a good story. If the prince did not have to suffer crossing seven seas, climbing seven mountains, defeating seven monsters to get to the princess, it wouldn’t be meaningful story or romance. In fact, one could almost say, blessed are the unhappy for it makes their story more meaningful (Matt 5:4). That is why unhappiness in not (always) a bad things after all.

Ps: Want to read more about what makes stories meaningful? Here is one way A Way of Stories…

No longer a Tween!!!

Tolkien’s Hobbit world, in which I wish I was living in, as of today, having crossed over my 33rd year, I would no longer be considered a Tween. Between ages 20 and 33, the Hobbits were considered to be in their “irresponsible twenties” – the tweens.

Ironically, I have done more irresponsible things in my 32nd year than the prior ones, quit my job to go back to school, grown long hair to name a couple. However, the truth is, the seemingly irresponsible things which I did are really adventures setting up the next stage of my life.

After 10 years in the field of Software, I got God’s call to go take care of His sheep by being in a preaching/teaching ministry. So I quit my job last October. I stopped getting haricuts because I figured I can be more generous with the books I bought if I save spending money on hair-cutters by having long hair. Besides, the best time to let down your hair a bit is when you are a student anyways.

All this to say, that the seemingly irresponsible things I have done is but a part of being in a bigger adventure. In Tolkien’s book ‘The Hobbit’, when Bilbo left his safe Shire to go, with Gandalf and the Dwarves, on what his Shireites would have considered an irresponsible errand, he really was embarking on a adventure. Every time Bilbo went through a rough patch in his adventure, Tolkien says that Bilbo would wish he had been in his home in Shire sipping tea and eating cake by the warm fire place. Over the past year, there have been rough patches where I have wished that I had the security of a good job. But the journey goes on and God has been immensely faithful to me.

Two roads diverged in the woods, and I took one. God has brought me so far on this road has helped me do so many things I would never have imagined to have been able to do. I am immensely grateful for His grace and presence being with me. I pray that God will help me be faithful to Him through the rest of the journey.

A New Adventure

After 10 years of working in the Software field, here I, on my last day of work am looking back with happy contentment and looking forward with an anxious excitement! Looking back to the cherished times I enjoyed working in the twilight zone between human beings and technology. Looking forward to the adventurous journey of going to Seminary to pursue my call to become a Theologian, Writer and Preacher, where I will navigate through the world of timeless ideas to bring new meaning into the lives of people.

Looking Back:

Looking back, there are three things I have cherished in my work life in the twilight zone.

1. Being a software Project manager, I have enjoyed working in the area of interface of people and technology – computers on one side and human relationships on the other, facing the best and the worst of both worlds (depending on the day :P).
2. Being a Subject Matter Expert in some specific domains, I have enjoyed helping people get to where they want to get to using the SME knowledge. There is a deep satisfaction in acquiring knowledge and then using that to help people achieve their goals.
3. Having started my work life in India, and then moving to Houston I have had the opportunity to build relationships at my work life with very diverse group of people. I have enjoyed having conversations with them about a lot of things ranging from politics to movies. Those are conversations and memories I will carry with me.

If there is one thing I will miss the most from my past 10 years of life working with/at MphasiS/AIG, it will be the people. (And of course, the easy pay checks too. :P).

Looking Forward:

Since the time I was in my late teens, the deeper questions of life have beckoned me to come explore them. I have been enthralled by the deeper questions pertaining to the meaning of life: Why is man the way he is – as Pascal calls him, “the thinking reed”, incredibly special but inexorably fragile; “a wretched angel” with so much good and bad comingled? How can man live the FULLEST life as Thoreau said, “live deep and suck out all the marrow of life”?

I always knew that at some point, I will have to embark on a journey into the world of ideas to explore my way through them and make my mark – the mark pointing to the Truth and bringing it to bear ‘fruit’ in the lives of people. Yes, ideas change people, starting from Pythagoras who talked about Truths being eternal to Foucault who said all truths were relative – mere tools in the hands of the powerful to manipulate the weak. As for me, to make my journey into the world of ideas, I choose Theology, or I should say Theology chose me! For it is in theology that philosophy, history and psychology blend with Revelation and Redemption into a strong portion that gives me the fortitude to wrestle with questions that bear fruit in the lives of people.

Being a Tolkien and Lewis fan, if I may borrow analogies from them to describe my venture, I would say that my new adventure is not unlike the adventure that Samwise Gamgee embarked on to rescue Middle Earth from Sauron and restore it to the true King. Nor is it unlike Sastha (from Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia – ‘Horse and His Boy’) who found himself hurled into a journey in the unknown realms to discover at the end that the point of his journey was to save his Father’s kingdom.The call to go on this journey has been indelibly written in my DNA. Like Bilbo (in Tolkien’s Hobbit) who with initial reluctance yet lasting resoluteness gives-in to his Tookishness (Took being his adventurous ancestor) to set about on a journey with Gandalf to rescue the lonely mountain from the Dragon Smaug, I too, with a resoluteness that has overwhelmed my reluctance am giving-in to my Call to go on my journey to glorify the King!

From a corner of my conscience
There has been a call
Steadily building into a crescendo
To build in the Kingdom, a castle

Not one of brick and mortar
But one of ideas and emotions
Of hearts and the minds
Of life and eternity

So I embark on an adventure
To explore deeper, that corner of my conscience
And build the castle that is comfort to the weary,
Built not on sand, but on the Rock!

The Rock that is the stone
The stone that will become a mountain
A mountain that will become a Temple-city
Filling the Cosmos in a crescendo of Praise!

(I am not so much of a poet. I know the last stanza may seem cryptic. Clue to interpret the last stanza: Imagery from the Book of Daniel and Revelation.)

PS: It is interesting that my last working day at my job is Oct-31 which is Reformation Day, the day when Luther nailed 95 thesis on the church door which got the ball rolling for the Protestant reformation movement. Of course, it is also All Saints Day when the Saints are celebrated as a symbol of the powers of evil being overcome – which actually has morphed into what we call the Halloween (for the good and the bad of it).